Once my children grew past their earliest years I allowed my role as mother to grow as well.  I believe that my main job is to supervise and teach my children to be successful sons and daughters, husbands and wives, mothers and fathers and servants of the Lord.  Following that way of thinking, I want my children to be able to prepare meals for the family.  As a young girl of eight, I had to cook for my family because my mother worked out of the home.  She left instructions and I managed to get everything ready for her final touches.  My first dishes were spaghetti, pot roast and fried chicken.  I could do everything except make the gravy because my mother wanted that dish to be lump-free.

I start my children out by having them help while others do the cooking. They first get into the action by making their own sandwiches.  Not long after that I have them make sandwiches for somebody else.  This helps them learn how to give service.  I start this early so that by age 5 they are making sandwiches.  I have found that the longer my children rely and then expect somebody else to help them, the more helpless they become and even worse, the more they develop the attitude that everybody exists simply to serve them.  By teaching my children to serve one another, even though it is not what they want to do, I have seen them grow up willing to help those around them.  I think it is because it is more fun to help others then siblings and it is something they are experienced in doing!

By the time they are seven, they begin to make simple meals: Hotdogs and pancakes are usually their first dishes.  They progress to greater independence in the kitchen over the years.  Their personalities come into play over what they plan for dinnertime.

I have some who want to experiment on new things following a recipe.  I have some who like to create their own dishes using simple formulas they have discovered such as carbohydrate + protein + dairy + seasoning makes a good dish and to make mom happy, toss in some vegetables.  And then there are the ones who suddenly realize that they are totally unprepared and have to resort to something like left-overs, hotdogs or microwave defrosted meals.  Finally, I have those who don’t want to fix anything they don’t like even though every body else might like the meal and that is all we have to eat because the trip to the store has been postponed!

One of the best helps to getting my children into the kitchen without it being an assignment, is to have their friends visit and have them make cookies.  When my young men or women have assignments from church for some dish, they are the ones who make it, or trade it with another sibling to prepare the meal.

Chani is almost twenty and has had a difficult time scaling down her meals to meet the needs of a single person.  Her roommates love that she can fix for all six of them without blinking an eye.  Teaching your children and then setting them lose in the kitchen with a few simple guidelines pays off over the years.  Years when Mom doesn't have to think about every meal, hundreds of meals each year.

Since my household job is to organize and supervise, I have the task of determining what schedule will be used by my family.  It is a lot of trial and error to find what works best.  Once that is discovered you always have to be ready to adjust and sometimes completely revamp as life develops around you.

For years I had a different child assigned a night for making dinner.  Some children had two nights.  I also had a different child assigned to help with the baby.  I found that if I didn’t have specific assignments, I would inevitably call on the closest child, the easiest child or the most capable child to help me thus encouraging all sorts of behavior I didn’t want.  This way, if I asked Chamrie to help with Chrystal and it is Ben’s day, she can simply take the baby to Ben.  I found that it was best to not have the dinner person also be the baby person.  It just made it too frustrating for everybody.  We also had a person assigned to help with Grandpa who was invalid and in our home until he died this past November.  Now, Chrystal is old enough to need very little help and Grandpa has joined Grandma so the dinner job is a little easier to schedule.

Summer brings its own problems in our family.  Because of our homeschooling we have not had to follow the typical American schedule.  Still, in the school year we try to follow one similar to their school friends.  Come summer, the late Utah light and the cooler evenings make it an ideal time to play.  My children do not want to come in to eat anything.  I have found that having the dinner type meal in the mid afternoon and just sandwiches and fruit etc in the later evening works best.  Also, whoever makes dinner sometimes uses the excuse that the children were not hungry when they served food, meaning that they didn’t want to stop playing to eat.  I require that no matter what, they stop and have prayer.  That way the absent minded child knows that dinner was indeed served and if they didn’t eat, I always have bread or fruit available after clean up but they better eat it before I say bedtime!

Children like easy clean up.  Try to find recipes that don’t take ½ a can of this or a partial package of that unless you have an easy storage system.  Double the recipe and freeze some rather then get frustrated at finding a ½ can of applesauce left on the counter.  A ½ bag of chocolate chips is an automatic good-bye anyway.

Have occasional fun evenings.  We had a medieval night and did Viking cooking.  We set the table and studied the customs of that time period and got into costume and invited an unsuspecting family.  Some of the dishes were flops and some were great.  We had an Middle East night, took out our table and set the room with blankets and veils and invited another family over for another interesting night.  We liked the Arabian food better then the Viking food!   One thing my children have learned is that it is easy to feed more people.  Feeding nine more is not much different then the original dozen, just a bigger pasta pan or a can of instant potatoes or turning a couple of frozen bags of ground beef into a sauce for topping rice.

My sister-in-law had a different type of schedule.  She had 7 meals and they were repeated constantly.  Her family always knew what to expect and how to fix it.  Her oldest and youngest were girls and there were four boys in between.  She said that what they lost on originality they made up on organization and with their very active church, sports and scout schedule it worked.

I’m too optional for that but with a little planning the same philosophy can be spread to 14 or 21 different family favorites with room left for leftovers.  Any menu plan will fall apart unless you plan on at least two nights of breaks in the routine per week.  Left-overs, sandwiches, date nights, guests…plan for unexpected by allowing yourself and your children to be flexible even amid consistent schedules.

One interesting plan uses the Creation as a model.  My book is packed at the moment but it goes something like this with a little creative license.  Day one: Light and Dark Meat, meaning a chicken main dish.  Day two (waters): Soup or bowl type of meal.  Day three (vegetation etc) a Vegetarian meal.  Day Four (Celestial creation) Now, I can not remember what the author did for this day… but since Fruit and Chocolate are the Celestial foods that sounds good to me.  Fifth would be fish.  Sixth is man’s day so it would be anything you fancy.  The Seventh would be the Lord’s day and would be something He might fancy.  Fun activities like this liven the family kitchen.

May you enjoy your family and allow your children the struggle today so they will be relaxed someday as a parent in the kitchen.

Everything you read here is freely offered, asking only that you honor my copyright by sending my site address to others rather than copying and sending the individual articles.  You may print and use my articles provided that you give credit to me as the author and link back to this site. The articles were written in the hope that they will help mothers realize just how normal chaotic life with children really is and how priceless the journey.  The Noble Child Email List Be notified of any new postings in the topics of homeschooling, parenting, home management and just plain fun.  Converse with other mothers and keep the joyful perspective while raising children.  Many of the mothers are LDS but the list is open to mothers of all religions. Email Cherie