When I was pregnant with my 9th baby, Neil and I went to our favorite restaurant in San Diego.  It was so crowded that the line went out the door and down the sidewalk.  We found ourselves in line behind another very pregnant woman.  As the line slowly moved forward, we struck up a conversation.  I asked her if her baby would be her first.  She replied that it was her second.  She continued to talk about her pregnancy for a few minutes and then asked if my baby was my first.  Neil said nothing, knowing what was about to happen.

"No, this is my ninth."

"Nine!  You're kidding!"  I just smile.  Then she said, "You must have easy labors."

I nod my head and agree.  "Yes, my fifth baby was only five contractions."  I continued past her envious stare by saying, "But, I have to go to bed or sit on the couch for nearly the entire pregnancy to get to that easy labor and then I have had most of them at home."

She's stunned, wondering how anybody could do that.  Neil is trying to not smile.  Finally, she thinks she has it all figured out and says, "I bet you love it when school starts!"

With a wicked gleam in my eye, I move in for the final shock, "Yes, I look forward to school every year.  I have always hometaught them and I enjoy returning to our normal routine."

The poor lady could barely pick herself up off the floor in time to move to her table. Neil was chuckling and leaned over to whisper, "You love that, don't you?"

And I do!  I really love the shocked expressions and the clear message that we do things quite differently.  However, I didn't mention that things do not always go smoothly.  Like this day I recorded in my 1996 journal:

I didn't get out of bed until quite late.  Neil had been up with the baby since about 7:30.  He was sitting on the floor with her and watching the weather channel.  I had asked that he get the children up, clothed, fed and morning jobs done so I could start school at 9 am.  I was already way off schedule.

When I came in and asked if these things were done he said, "I have been trying to watch the weather channel."  Then I saw my dear children.

I asked Chiya (rather skeptically), "Are you dressed?" She said,  "Half-way." Good.  Math has just been covered.

Ben said, "I have to shower."  Wonderful.  Health lesson has been done.

Nathan wanted to know what to have for breakfast.  "Whatever you can find."  I grumbled. Great!  Home Economics and Self Sufficiency in one fell swoop!

Ryan and Cheyanne were already scavenging in the kitchen taking a bite or two out of apples and a taste of this and that. Hey...I'm on a role with an interactive history lesson: How early Hunter and Gatherers' lived.

Chani and Chamrie were safely elsewhere.  Chalk one up for Government and Delegation Class as they are the ones who fill in when Dad is watching the weather channel.  I think we are failing this class.

Then we had Family Scripture study and our Articles of Faith lesson.  Then I read the first chapter of Swiss Family Robinson to the eager listeners amid the cries of little Chalae, the chatter of Ryan and Cheyanne and the workings of the washing machine and dryer.

To top it off, Neil was in the room trying winter coats on each of the children.

Shortly afterwards, I was informed that lunch time had arrived AND it was 1 PM so school should be over!

My journal entry ends with this determined declaration: "Tomorrow, we start at NINE AM SHARP!"

Neil and I married in June 1978.  Two weeks later I was elated to discover that I was pregnant.  In 22 years of living, I had never experienced anything like this!  The fairy-tale existence of a new bride combined with the overwhelming emotional roller coaster of pregnancy was all-encompassing.  Neil never knew what to expect from me.  One moment I was organizing my castle and the next I was sobbing in the kitchen, unable to decide which dish to wash first.  And I cried.  For three months I cried every day.  Not all day of course, just every time Neil had to walk out the door and leave me alone.
The day came when Neil walked into the bedroom and found me sitting on the bed, watching my belly move.  I tried to get him to feel our baby, but every time his hand touched the kicking spot, our little one quieted down.  I was enthralled.  Nothing...nothing could ever be like this!  The awful part of pregnancy was gone and replaced by the miracle.  I was going to be a mother!

Life changed suddenly in January.  I became a mother much sooner than expected.  Our little son was born 6 weeks premature and weighed 3 pounds 6 ounces.  He struggled to breathe and was taken to Children's Hospital in San Diego.  That first night of motherhood found me in one hospital, my son in another and my husband asleep at home.  Now I cried for real.  My heart was breaking.  All I wanted in the entire world was to hold my baby and be held by my husband.

The next 8 1/2 weeks moved at an exhaustingly slow pace.  Every day found us at the hospital, watching, touching, talking to our little angel.  We noticed that when we were with our tiny son his vital signs would improve.  Marshall was on a drug that paralyzed his little body so he wouldn't fight the machine breathing for him.  He shouldn't have had any control over his body and yet every time we whispered to him that we had to leave, he would struggle to open his eyes.  Our hearts told us that he was trying to get us to stay, just a little longer.

Suddenly, too quickly, the day came when I held my son while my husband held me.  I cuddled my little Marshall and the world faded away.  There was no existence anywhere outside of our little circle of love.  Then my sweet Neil, his heart breaking, whispered, "He's gone.  Our son is gone."

The weeks and months that followed were filled with intense and sometimes vague emotions.  Motherhood had eluded me.  Never had I ever envisioned this!  Where did I fit in?  I wasn't like the women who were raising children....I had never brought my baby home.  I wasn't like the women whose children had grown and left home..those women had years of raising their babies.  I wasn't like the women who couldn't have children.  I could...I did...and I was alone.

Then something settled deep in my heart.  A great comfort and understanding washed over me as I realized that I was indeed a mother.  That I was a mother who had experienced a lifetime with her baby.  A lifetime...no matter its length...a lifetime of love, experience, and perspective. A sweet lifetime...my son's entire life.

When my beautiful, full-term Chani was placed in my arms, the wonder of life permeated everything I did.  And the commitment to be her mother for a lifetime filled my soul. I held her, cuddled her, comforted her, and taught her.  I marveled at her accomplishments and was delighted with her giggles.  I was amused by her play and comforted by her kisses.  I grew so much just being Chani's mother that I was relieved when her bedtime arrived so that I could renew myself for the next day's adventures.

When this little angel was 11 months old, I read an article about homeschooling.  I had never suspected that such a thing existed.  Instantly and deeply I knew that in order to have Chani stay the delightful person that she was, I needed to teach her at home.  I knew the same would be true of all my children.  It was an inner commandment, not just an idea or suggestion...but something deeper and sure.  Well...I had time to explore this new concept..after all...Chani was just turning 1 year!

But, Time has a way of inching along and rushing by.  It seemed that suddenly, my oldest was 5, my next was 3, my youngest was a year-and-a-half, we had another baby due in a few months...and our great homeschool experiment was upon us.  Now...the practical stuff started crowding in on me, the curriculums, the organization, the scheduling, the worry, the inspiration...so many parts to being a homeschooling mom.  If I was going to survive homeschooling an ever growing family, I'd have to discover what worked best for us.

I want to share with you the concepts that have worked for our family.  As I do, I hope that you will find yourselves adapting them to your particular life.  It doesn't matter whether you homeschool for twenty years or only for one, you will want to enjoy the process and be able to make guilt-free decisions when faced with frustrating situations.  These concepts will help you do that once you have adjusted them to suit your unique family.

The five elements that I believe go into our family’s homeschooling are:
1.  Developing the Long View - the Purpose.
2.  Philosophies which guide behavior to match view.
3.  Structure to support the view.
4.  Communication to enrich understanding and keep us moving in the desired direction
5.  Attitude Management because it is the attitude that keeps the fire lit.