When babies are first born they have a walking reflex.  If you hold them over a table, letting their feet touch the top, they will mimic walking.  This reflex doesn't last long.  It disappears as the baby grows and begins the motions of development that will lead to walking.

Among my babies,  language seems to be  the same.  My new little babies come to us knowing and understanding more fully than we can ever imagine.  One of my daughters is so gifted in conversation that even as a new baby she seemed to remember a higher and more beautiful language.  In the morning she would lie between us and make sounds that our experienced ears recognized as something different, something that was just beyond our full hearing. Before long, our babies begin to lose the memory of that purer language as they learn the step by step patterns of mortal conversation.

I believe it is the same with our children and their spiritual development.  They come to us knowing something of God that is beyond our memory but as they grow in their family that knowledge sometimes gets pushed into the recesses of their minds.  So it comes to the parents to reconnect our children through the Language of Prayer. The task falls to us to awaken within their hearts and minds that something grander and purer that exists all around them and just beyond the moment.

Prayer is our talking to Deity.  God has many titles, different faiths are more comfortable with some titles than with others.  But we all know who we mean as we enter into God's presence through prayer.  And we are our children's teachers.  They learn from our words and from our actions.

I believe that there are some important elements that go into teaching our children how to pray.

Time.  It takes time to develop and strengthen relationships and prayer is no exception.

Having a picture of what we need and desire gives shape to the prayer.

Words come from the creation of thought, knowledge and commitment.   They are the creative force bringing the prayer to life.

And feelings.  Feelings are the power behind prayer, the power to know that we have stretched heaven-ward and have been honest and faithful in our prayer.  These are the things our children want us to teach them.  The when, what, how and why of prayer brings our children to experience the Who of prayer.

For the next few articles I'll explore teaching our children the power of prayer.  This article is about establishing moments in our lives for conversing with God.

Traditional Prayer Time

There are traditional times to pray.  Prayers over meals, morning prayers, evening prayers, sacrament prayers, prayers for opening and closing meetings.  Taking the time to pray at these traditional moments builds a solid foundation for the child.  Routine is very important in organizing his view of life.  A young child who has been raised with evening prayer before bed will often remind the parent when those prayers were forgotten.  Take time to teach both family and personal prayer.  Teach that not all prayers are powerful, life-changing events but that the constant exercise of praying will steadily guide life.  It establishes in the child's mind that Deity is a part of every day.  Decide when you will have your consistent prayer time and set the foundation for your child's mind to turn to God on a regular basis.

Prepared Prayer Time

There are times when prayer follows deep contemplation or is part of the decision making process.  This is when we prepare ahead of time for the moment of prayer.  I'm not talking about the prayerful attitude preparation that accompanies all prayer.  Instead, I'm talking about the weighing of options, the inner preparation to discover exactly what you want to communicate to God when you do pray.  In our church we have a day of fasting every month.  While the act of fasting is reserved for the older child and adult as small children, pregnant and nursing mothers, the sick and elderly do not fast, all enter into a purpose for the fast and that purpose is uttered in prayer.  Our children are taught that some prayers happen after a period of thought and conversation among those involved about what is needed or desired.  Special prayers, focused on a specific person falls into this area of Prepared Prayer Time.

Prepared Time teaches our children the process of problem identifying and seeking counsel and direction to overcome the problems.  It also teaches our children the importance of a family or group having a common goal.  It teaches our children that some conversations happen after the work of organizing and seeking have already taken place.  Decisions are made and then confirmation is sought through specific prayer.

Now, you can have Prepared Time mixed right in with Tradition Time.  You can decide to spend the evening prayer focusing on a specific child or problem.  You can accomplish both teaching moments at the same time.  But it doesn't always have to be combined.  By identifying the difference between the two types and what each teaches you can determine what and when those moments happen.

Constant Prayer Time

We offer our God our lives, seeking to become of one mind and one heart with Him.  This is living in constant prayer.  It is not that we are constantly voicing or thinking words of prayer.  This is living the life and recognizing the source of that life.  We teach our children by example and simple words that we seek to involve God in who we are and what we do.  Little things, like talking about mistakes.  Sometimes as parents we make mistakes, thinking a child does something wrong when it really was somebody else.  Explaining that while mom and dad might not know everything and do the best we can while we learn to be better parents, God does know and will never misjudge.

He is involved in our lives.  Our attitudes are either prayers unto God or curses raised to heaven.  Teaching our children about Constant Prayer teaches them to have the long view.  To see beyond the frustrations of the moment and the grief that descends upon everybody from time to time.  It teaches them to find beauty and awe in everything around them.  It gives them the tools of faith and patient.  And it helps them know that they are loved at all times, by God and by their parents.

How do we teach this?  By words, explaining moments as they happen.  By daily example most of all.  This type of prayer is one of acknowledgment, gratitude, and trust in God's plan and love.  We teach our children by helping them focus on the positive things around them, by helping them understand other people from a compassionate perspective, and yes, by teaching them that justice sometimes takes time to make its appearance but until then they can focus on hope in prayer.  This is perhaps the hardest prayer time.  Especially when faced with injustice and unbearable struggles.  But what do we want for our children?  Do we want them raised with an attitude of helplessness, despair and disappointment in life?  Or do we want them to be able to reach in themselves and find the strength and courage that faith can give?  Teach them about living lives in constant prayer and gratitude and we prepare them better for life than by ignoring that precious spark.

Emergency Prayer Time

There are those moments when the weight of emergency, grief or trauma drives us to our knees and causes a cry to rise from our very soul all the way to heaven in an instant.  Emergency Time.  That time that comes in an instant, that comes with unbelievable force, and for which the only preparation is all in that moment.  How do we help them have faith to keep their spirits strong enough to seek their God during such intense events?  By giving them the foundation formed by traditional prayer time, the soul-searching process developed by prepared prayer time, and the strength of character of living in a constant attitude of prayer, our children will seek God in their emergencies because it will be the most comforting and natural thing for them to do.  And as parents of faith, that is exactly what we hope for our precious angels.

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