I disagree with the concept that to have free agency one must have the lack of legal consequences to that agency.  Instead it seems obvious to me that to have agency one must have accountability or there could be no sin, no atonement and certainly no divine judgement.  The Lord holds individuals accountable for actions, sins and repentance.

    He holds a nation accountable for their laws.  We are, each of us, accountable as a nation for the laws of our government.  In America that means specifically, "Are the laws in agreement with the Law of the Land which is the Constitution based upon God's Law."  If our laws are contrary, the nation suffers, the righteous as well as the wicked in that nation.  For example, When there is famine all starve.

    God grants people agency.  Law has no agency nor any real power to control agency.  The law, itself,  receives no consequence of its righteous or wicked wording.  Laws are about consequences, that is where the written word has power.  A nation is accountable because it is made up of people, accountable to God for the laws.  The consequences of keeping or breaking those laws reflect a nation's concern with God's commandments

    Certainly, there are laws that can hinder a person's actions.  Such as a law forbidding prayer in school.  That law doesn't take away a person's agency to obey or to disobey.  The agency to obey or not is exactly what God has granted us.  Basically God has said that HE, emphasis upon HE, will not force one into heaven.  It says nothing whatsoever about any other form of force or false promises of a lack of consequence.

    President Benson said that the battle for freedom was the battle that ushered in this mortality and the battle for freedom could very likely be the one that ushers in the Millennium.  He talks about taking a stand for freedom at every point.  However, nowhere will you find that he saysthat fight for freedom means abolishing laws that support the laws of God.  We have been warned about how subtle and verbally clever Satan is.  He would use the Lord's doctrine to his advantage and confuse even the saints if they are not careful.

    For active saints some issues concerning agency are clear.  It is easy to understand that abolishing a law that supports the doctrine of our body being a temple is an irresponsible action.  It is harder to figure where agency fits in raising children.

    There are wonderful people who have a great reverence for people's free agency and would never, ever step on their free actions.  They would never insist that their children attend church.  They would let them know how they felt but the act of attendence would be left to the child's choice.  These same individuals are often critical of those who raise their children in a more strict atmosphere of following counsel.

    Our focus is that while our children are children they are our stewardship and we are accountable to God for certain things.  Church attendance being one of them.  So, yes.  I would insist that a child, a teen, attend church.  I cannot force her to feel the spirit.  I cannot force her to be converted.  I cannot force her to like the experience, to agree with me, or to even like me at that moment.  I feel that such focus upon stewardship does not take away agency, just as no amount of laws to the contrary interfere with my agency and accountability before God.

    I have found consistently through the years that when a youth has been raised in an truly active and loving LDS home and they begin to fault the doctrine, even joining other churches, it has almost always been because they wanted to do something or were already doing something that they have been taught to be contrary to the Lord's plan.  Here is where you will find phrases such as "brainwashed by parents and teachers" or "what I do is between me and the Lord, not some other man."  I have found that those things which bring about youthful apostasy fall into three main categories: sexual sin, Word of Wisdom sin, and church attendance.  Very rarely will you find a youth who will leave the church because of real doctrinal issues.  Oh, they will say that is the reason but if you call them on it you will find that it started because of participation or desire to participate in the above sins.

     So, as parents we are strict about many things.   We maintain a control of music listened to in our home.  We maintain a control of movies watched.  We insist upon church meetings being attended.  We insist upon participation in family prayer, scripture study and family time.  We do not give them a choice about age of dating nor about behavior in our home.

    These are things that we believe we shall be accountable to God for in the management of our home.  If our children go contrary to our rules, we need to be able to say to Christ, "This was our law in both word and our example."  That would leave our children accountable for their sins without our being a party to it.  Oh, they may, in this life, blame us for their actions.  "I was forced to attend church so my inactivity rebellion is my parents' fault!"  But, by the time they stand before Christ there will be no self deception.  In fact, to fully repent, they must recognize the sin as theirs and not ours.  We will, however, be accountable for those things that we do in raising them which are contrary to the Holy Spirit.

    We will be seriously accountable for those things we do that is contrary to what we teach.   I believe it confuses children to teach one thing and to expect something different from them.  If we teach that we love them and in order to be together forever we must keep the Lord's commandments which include attendance of church but it is ok in our family for some to not attend if they don't want...see the confusion in the mind and heart?

    I can tell you that we do all we can to follow what the Lord commands in this family.  We are constantly evaluating and adjusting course to stay on track.  Still, our family has contention.   We have children who yell, who argue, who don't do their jobs, who don't want to pray, who seem to challenge everything every time!  Our family consists of  a dad who gets tired and doesn't want the jumping around of little children to rock his vegetating and a mother who doesn't want to be interrupted when she is writing or researching.  "Go away!" and, "Your sister will read to you," or "In a few minutes!" are common phrases as is an occasional yell of "I AM ALMOST DONE!".  How in the world does a family do it who does NOT keep all the commandments that they can?  Knowing how much we struggle even though we are on target makes me tremble in fear for my children and their homes should they be less then fully committed to eternal life.

    Believing that next to inspiration and commitment, stewardship, accountability and agency are among the most important principles, it is important to understand how it all fits together in structuring our family.

    At first the stewardship is owned by another.  In the preexistence, this was God's role.  In mortality it is the parents.  They are accountable to God for the teaching of his commands to the children.  Ultimately, stewardship over our lives is ours to give to Christ or to withhold from Christ.

    At first this is accountability to parents.  The parents are accountable to God.  Young children can do wrong things.  They are not accountable for those wrong things.  The sin of wrong actions is automatically swallowed up in Christ's atonement.  However, if the parents do not teach the young children the wrongness of actions and the process of repentance that they will someday need to follow the sin belongs to parents.  Such a sin can only be cleansed through repentance by the parents.

    Then at age eight the children become accountable to God.  God chose this seemingly arbitrary age for a very good reason.  The type of sin that an 8-year-old can get into is very, very different from the type of sin that an 18-year-old can commit.  It gives the child a buffer zone. Not one free of sin but instead one where the repentance process can be experienced and cleansing recognized a step at a time without life threatening consequences.

    During this buffer zone the parent continues his stewardship over the child.  With that stewardship come the accountability.  Again, the accountability is whether the laws of God, the doctrines of the kingdom are taught by word and deed.  A loving parent will feel pangs of sorrow over their child's need to repent but they can trust that they are free from the sin because of their own teachings and examples.  They can focus on helping their child without agonizing distraction.

    What is God's determination of when parental stewardship ceases?  Is it age 12 as in the age when a Hebrew youth, and Christ, became a man?  No.  In Christ's day there was little difference in character and readiness then in our day.  Twelve-year-Olds were still twelve and beginning the hormone obstacle course as they left childhood behind and entered the adult world.  There remained the need to teach and direct their lives.  Christ remained accountable to Joseph who was accountable to God.  Christ was still under Joseph's stewardship.  This is seen when Jesus was asked what he was doing in the temple after his twelfth birthday.  Christ knew he was doing his Heavenly Father's work and yet he left and returned home with his earthly family until a much later date.

    As parents, we are wise to recognize that with the increase of responsibilities should automatically come an increase in choices of action.  Some actions.  Actions that are not contrary to the inspired direction that the parents received.

    So if a parent's stewardship doesn't end with the onslaught of puberty, then when?

    Does it end at the arbitrary declaration of government that a child is an adult at age 18?  I remember growing up and that adult age was 21.  Did God make the change in the social age of an adult?

    There is strong evidence in the scriptures that as long as the parent is righteous and inspired their stewardship remains.  Accountability however, does not remain except for the accountability to counsel in righteousness.  The Order of Heaven is the Patriarchal Order.

    The Constitutional government and the church itself are temporal organizations built up for the support of that Order and the time when it will be the governing body.  If that is the case then stewardship to one's family never really ceases in righteousness.  Stewardship is not given up in a righteous family, it is gained.  As the children marry and begin to have children the grandparents are added onto both in blessing and in responsibility.  Now their responsibility is to council in inspiration while the new set of parents set up their own house of stewardship.  The circle repeats.

    What about Free Agency?  Where does it come into play?  Step by step it is the ability to follow God and righteous parents or to not follow them, to suffer from sin and to be cleansed by repentance or to remain in sin.  That is the agency.  That is God's promise.  That he will allow us to suffer if we choose, or to be cleansed and healed if we choose.  Remember, that was Satan's argument, he would force us to be good, to not suffer sin and have no need for repentance.  Such a plan would eliminate the need for a Savior.  Such a plan was contrary to agency.  Christ's plan was that he would teach us, be an example for us, atone for us and if we follow him then the Glory be to the Father.  Glory means the salvation and eternal life of men which was Christ's work.

    In other words, He was given a stewardship by Our Father to atone and teach.  He had an accountability to the Father to do all things needed to fulfill that stewardship.  He maintained the agency to succeed or to fail in that stewardship and accountability, but not until it was
the right time.  Until it was the right time to really be about his father's business he was bound to the governing of the parents that God chose to raise him..

    The Latter-day saints who are sealed in the temple have the promise that there is no accident that they have the specific children that they do, provided they do not turn from inspiration and covenants.   The Lord will inspire us in the family laws and rules we establish for the eternal benefit of our family.  It does not matter if the family is strict or relaxed.  It doesn't matter if they watch science fiction shows or only church videos.  It doesn't matter if they have family home evening on Mondays or on Sundays.  It doesn't matter if they kneel in the living room as they say family prayer or add it to their humble dinner meal.  It does matter that they follow the Lord's inspiration with consistent courage.  The Lord has promised us eternal life with our beloved family and his promise is sure.